Lately Alec, who turns 10 in December, has been asking a lot of tough questions about life. He overhears items in the news, sees newspapers in the stores, etc. so he is starting to notice what is going on around him in the world. I’ve always been honest with him about things he asks, although attempted to make it age appropriate for him. Now that he’s older and he understands more, the conversations are becoming more complex. Yesterday on the way to swimming lessons, he asked about Hezbollah and about things he had heard with regards to the war. As I’m talking I mentioned Civilian Casualties. He asked what that meant and when I explained to him what it was, he said;

“Mom, I don’t think casualty is a very good word for that. It makes it sound too little, like it doesn’t matter, like it’s casual. It should be civilian deaths.”

And as he said that, I realized, he was right. It’s easy to throw around the word casualty, and if we said Civilian Deaths or Civilian Murders, would we give it more credence. Alec doesn’t understand why people would do these things to each other. It makes no sense to him. And as he asks me questions about the war, about oil, about governments, I hope that I will be able to give him information so that he can form his own opinions.

It’s 10:30 pm and I’m tired. I want to go to bed early for a change. Typically I head to bed around anytime between 1 and 2 am. I mowed my lawn both yesterday and today. It had gotten a little out of control and I think my neighbor’s were wondering about the hay field I was growing. It took 2 days because my lawnmower kept croaking in the long grass and needed time to recover. I since found out from my Dad, that I shouldn’t have let that happen or I’ll burn the motor out. Fortunately though, my grass doesn’t typically get this long, but with the trip to Montreal, then camping and work, there never seemed to be time. So it’s finally done. Then I spent the day working with either business stuff or one of my contracts that I still have with Goose Lane. I finally was feeling cage crazy so I went out and shot some hoops at the nasis field house. I’m retraining my shot. With my shoulder injury and my broken wrist from a gazillion years ago (age 20, slam dunking off a picnic table - DO NOT DO THIS YOURSELF) my shot went to hell, so I’m finally now trying to shoot properly rather than the bad habit shot I’ve developed over time. I ran into a friend when I arrived there, we chatted a bit. Then I came home and got back to work on the company media kit that is being sent out tomorrow to some organizations. I’m feeling sluggish though and sleep deprived. I can only go so long with the late nights before I have a night where I just crash and I think I’m heading to it tonight. I’ll be in bed by 11 tonight, which will be early for me. The kids will be back home tomorrow.

Oh and for those of you who have been asking for pictures of the house, I’ve put up a set at flickr.

YAWN (hey, as I wrote that, I actually yawned, seems like the yawn effect of seeing someone yawn, also happens when writing the word yawn;))

Alec and I are off to Saint John today to see a developmental pediatrician, that we have been on the waiting list for almost two years. She’s going to be assessing Alec for asperger’s syndrome. If he has it, and we suspect he may, we know it’s mild. There are particular areas that Alec has always had trouble with, although as he gets older, he’s able to learn to compensate for some of them. In many ways Alec is brilliant, he’s been tested and his scores are in the gifted range for most areas (vocabulary, comprehension, math, etc.), except in areas like processing (ability to put pen to paper) he’s way below average. Although truthfully that’s the least of our concerns as most of his difficulties lie with social issues. He has been bullied and picked on by kids since entering the school system. It gets better each year, but he’s still different. He knows it and we’re trying hard to give him the skills to fit in better. It’s a lack of self-awareness of what he is doing, and often times it’s something really annoying to the other kids. Yet ironically, most adults who talk to Alec find him mature, and able to have mature conversations. Adults tend to be more forgiving than his peers of his social blunders. He’s had these aspects since he was just a toddler and we thought he’d grow out of them, but it never happened. So, I’m off, will update when we get back.

The session went very well. The Dr. was very warm and listened well. I didn’t feel rushed. She had Alec draw pictures and let him wander around the room, so she was able to observe him without his feeling put on the spot. She asked both him and I lots of questions and tested him for various aspects. By the end of the session, she said that she still had one more test to do that is one on one with Alec, but that at this point, it is highly likely that he has Asperger’s Syndrome. She is going to make sure that he has more thorough occupational therapy (OT) and speech therapy (he has a bit of a lisp). Last year in school he had OT, but they only spent 3 sessions with him and mostly focused on pencil holding. The Dr. said (as we already knew) that he has strong sensory integration issues. And the OT needs to address those. So overall I felt relieved because it sounds like he is on the path to get the support in the school system that he needs. She’s going to create a plan for us to implement at home as well.

Someone reading these last couple of posts might envision a child that is strange or really different, but in many, many ways, Alec is just like every other kids. As I said, most people who meet him briefly just think he’s a little quirky. I have every confidence that with time, maturity and practice, Alec will be able to fit into his peer groups as well as any other kid. And sometimes there are advantages, many kids with Asperger’s become computer programmers (they say Bill Gates may have it;)) or University Professors, so who knows. Truthfully as long as Alec is happy, able to form friendships with people and able to function well in life, I’ll be happy.

It’s my birthday today. I’m 37 years old. My birthday perspective these last few years is always in terms of how far away 40 is. So only 3 more years now till the big 40. Although Oprah says that a woman’s 40’s are the new 30’s. That sounds like a good game plan to me;)

So, I’m 37 years old. Single with two wonderful kids. I have a great job. I own a house. I’m neurotically busy. But overall, I guess I’m not in a bad place for 37. So happy birthday to me:)