Tonight was a meet the teacher’s night at Alec’s school. I had the opportunity to talk to the extra mural Occupational therapist and Speech and Language therapist. They seemed really motivated to develop a plan for Alec. They aren’t at the school the whole year, but they will create a plan with items we can implement at home as well as at school. His teacher did a presentation for the parents and it went very well. I have a good feeling about her. I also joined the Parent and School Committee (PSSC) and I’m hoping that I’ll have some input on some items at the school.

On other fronts. I have a miserable cold. I played basketball with it last night and today I’m feeling even worse. I hope it’s better before I take off to TX on Monday. I won’t be able to take my dristan nasal spray on the plane, lol. Actually I need to find out more details about that. I can’t take liquids or gels, but what exactly does that constitute? Is mascara or lipstick ok? I suppose a gel cap tylenol would be banned. Ok, I just googled and found the official list. Mascara is not ok, but lipstick is, as long as it’s not gel. Concealer is ok, but not liquid makeup. Ok, guys I know, roll your eyes;) But hey a single woman has to keep things in perspective;) You know what is interesting, is that you CAN take on personal lubricant. So you can’t take on sunscreen, lotions or toothpaste, but you can have personal lubricant. Because you never know when you’re going to need personal lubricant on an airplane, lol.

This morning when I woke Alec up for school, I reminded him that he had a x-country meet today. He started whining and complaining and saying he didn’t want to do it. I asked him how come and he said he hated it. So I asked him why did he join the team if he hated it. Which then led to him saying, “I thought you’d be proud of me, you told me I should get involved in things in school.” sigh. That led to a conversation of me explaining that yes, I wanted him to get involved in things at school, but things he likes or enjoys. That I don’t want him doing something he hates to make me proud. That I’m just as proud of him, if not more, when he helps Bram put on his sneakers in the morning. Or when he tells me that he tried to stop some kids at school from bullying a younger student. It’s frustrating because you think you’re bringing across the right message and you still miss something along the way.

So then he asks me if he can quit, since he joined for me. That’s where I said no, he only has 2 more meets and he joined the team, made a committment and has a responsibility to them as well. I don’t want him to give up things either. Trying to find that balance as a parent isn’t easy. Then I told him that next time he joins something, try to think about the reasons for doing it.  Maybe I’m making wrong choices at times, but like most of us, we try to make decisions that we think will hopefully reflect our values, ideas and enable our kids to make responsible choices themselves.

Update: I just arrived back from Alec’s meet. Typically he comes last or second to last in a group of 58 kids or so. I don’t care how he does and it’s never bothered him a lot about where he places either. But today he came 44 out of 56 and he was so excited when he finished. He ran up to me and said ”I’m so proud of myself, that I made it in the 40’s. Maybe next meet I’ll be in the 30’s and maybe some time I’ll make it in the top 10!”. To hear him say he was proud of himself was a moment I wouldn’t lose. Alec often doesn’t feel worthy, it’s part of his asperger’s, his self esteem struggles. I asked him if he still wanted to quit x-country. He said

“no, I did join because I wanted to make you proud. But I didn’t realize I’d make myself proud too.”

It’s moments like that, that I think are priceless.

We got a blast of snow this morning, approx 10-15 cm they say. School was cancelled and the kids are home. I’m running around trying to get last minute stuff for the wellness expo taken care of as well as a million other work related things. And with this weather I have no idea when I’m leaving for Moncton, either later this afternoon or early tomorrow morning. Although from the looks of it, it’s a gamble either way, sigh.

Everyone was saying yesterday how they couldn’t believe we were getting a snow storm, but I stumbled on one of my old blog posts yesterday and saw we had snow in May in 2003. So yes, let’s resign ourselves to the fact that we’re not out of this crappy weather yet.